Monday, 21 January 2019

Anonymous giving- What don’t we understand?


Charles Onyango Obbo in his book Uganda’s Poorly Kept Secrets tells a story of a man living in London, who stumbles upon a story of a single mother from Namuwongo, a Kampala suburb who was struggling with her kids and other adopted children. This woman’s story had made it to the dailies and she was calling on well-wishers to help build her a shack where the family would put their heads. It captivated the man from London and before long he took it upon himself to send a weekly amount of money to this woman to cater for her needs and those of her children. No one knew the identity of the man.

Onyango Obbo tells another intriguing story, this time of a university student. A private student who had just joined her dream university, Makerere suddenly found herself without sponsorship after both her parents lost their jobs while she was in year one. She appealed to The Monitor newspaper then and it offered to run her appeal to good Samaritans to come up and help her. “Many people expressed sympathy, because that was all they could afford. One woman went further. She rang me and offered to pay fees for the young woman. Only on one condition: she would deliver the money to me to pass on, and I was never to disclose her identity. I agreed. So, without fail, at the beginning of every university term, she would send an envelope full of cash enough to pay the fees, and I would pass it on. The young woman graduated from university, and the family had an emotional party for her. She came with her mother, who was in tears, to my office to ask who the anonymous benefactor was so that they could invite her to the celebrations. The benefactor said she was touched, but insisted she wanted to remain anonymous. And so it is to this day.”

The idea of anonymous giving is one that fascinates to say the least but is intriguing at best. I have always desired to understand the genetic make of people who choose to do this. What are they made of? Why do they choose to do it that way? Is it humility? Are they embarrassed by the praise that would be lavished on them? Does it make them feel better?

This week alone I saw it play out on two separate occasions. There is a very popular program on Bukedde TV where the presenter comes out and appeals to the general public to offer some help to the often helpless. On this particular one, it was a minor who by a stroke of unimaginable mischance had become pregnant but was unable to look after the child, she could barely find what to dress in and the man responsible was on the loose. Well wishers from far and wide poured in various items including money but unexpectedly many of them insisted that their identities not be disclosed. It didn’t strike me as strange after all there was a whole web of interminable complications that still shrouded this particular matter. Perhaps they could have avoided the full glare that comes with media attention but I maybe I was wrong.

However, while in church on Sunday the circumstances were completely out of the ordinary. The Chaplain at church announced to us the purchase of new musical items. We were further informed that these were not any usual instruments but state of the art. They had cost a fortune and these had been contributed by one family who were part of the congregation but preferred not to be mentioned. These were two separate events, same storyline, probably with similar intentions and exactly the same end results.

Later in the day as I engaged in a discourse with a pal, I learnt much more and got a better understanding of the occurrences. There are many Christian values that many of us have by omission or even commission chosen to neglect, that many of our spiritual fathers have for their own individual interests refused to teach, that for example giving should never be about being praised by those around or your neighbors and neither should it be a show contest. It should be between you and your God. Genuine giving is never about who is seeing, it is more about someone’s heart. I know we are in an age where recognition is important, where everyone wants a podium mention for what they give, are giving or yet to give but many times that takes away the real reason for doing what we do. In this conversation, my friend told me she would feel ‘embarrassed’ if her name had to be mentioned every time she gave something. “It would invite eyes that look at you in different forms. That is why I would do everything to make sure I am not mentioned.”
As J D Rockefeller said, we should begin thinking about giving not as a duty but as a privilege but this should not be a privilege we flash across the world for all others to see.

“But when you help a needy person, do it in such a way that even your closest friend will not know about it.” Mathew 6:3

Blessed week!
 

No comments:

Post a Comment