Throughout my academic life and journey, there was
that particular statement that at one time each one pulled out like a magic wand;
they used it time and again depending on how convenient it was. I remember as a
little boy whenever you would try to show someone the right thing to do (or
what you thought was right) they would tell you off, emphasizing that it is
only right that you do mind your business, with all the lordliness written over
their face. That was a life lesson that I learnt at a beardless stage, that
wherever you have no stake then it was only prudent that you don't indulge. I
learnt many life lessons as an infantile but perhaps this one stands head and
shoulders above the rest, and probably one that surfaces each day we are under
the sun.
Privacy is now understood as a right and the denial
of this right is a violation through and through. That is for the state but
today I come to discuss individuals and how w come face to face with this right.
A few days ago a dear friend of mine paid me a courtesy visit and like all such
visits, we shared the pleasantries and talked and laughed. The conversation was
diverse, from academics to life in general, to career to the changing patterns of
the world. Midway our discussion, I excused myself and stepped out to
straighten up something, my phone remained behind. On my return, I picked up it
up and like the nature of all smart phones you are able to see what someone
last checked for. I noticed that my visitor had picked up my phone and
conveniently without my permission scrolled through my chats and checked for whatever
she wanted. Her motive to this day is still shrouded in mystery but that is not
the point for discussion today. The point really is why people can still have
such improper, inappropriate and imprudent behavior.
Many thoughts of
course came to mind but the most pronounced and the thread of this writing is
why people have difficulty in respecting private spaces. But much more than that
I also asked myself the obvious, why did she do what she did, was she
successful in what she sought for and much more than that. I may have been
wrong, probably she was bored when I moved out and decided to be passing
through my personal messages, or probably she didn't even notice what she was
doing. Be the above as it may, there are fundamentals that we can't afford to
violate and personal space for me tops that list. I always like to say that
there is a reason why a mobile phone is personal, unlike a land-line. That
whatever is there is for the individual, and can only be used with their
express permission. I personally was not angry or hurt or betrayed but because
there was an option of asking for it from me, I felt what she did was rather
uncouth. True to the fact, there was nothing to hide, the absence of a password
being the first indicator.
David Sedaris
once said that when you read someone else’s diary, you get what you deserve.
The trend for many of us millennials unfortunately has been to “live in other
people’s lives.” The desire to know who is dating who, where so and so has
taken their girlfriend or boyfriend and much more of such trivialities. It can
be one’s desire to check on their friends and know what they are up to in their
lives but that too has a line that you dare not cross. We must try and balance
the two otherwise we may find ourselves spending much more time in chasing what
is in other people’s lives and forget that we have our own to live.
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