De’-Pato, you forgot to say Goodbye! Rest in Peace

It's too hard to say goodbye
It's too hard to say goodbye
just can't say goodbye
              Westlife


On Thursday March 26, 2020, as the cover of darkness slowly lifted to give birth to a new day, it took with it a life of a bright, promising young man. It took with it my good friend and brother, Patrick Kansiime. The account by those who were with him in his last hours is that he was fine (atleast by looks and deeds). He wasn’t complaining about anything the night before, made plans for the following day and went to bed like we all did. He actually woke up very early in the morning (around 6am) and even took a glass of water before shortly going back to bed. Patrick didn’t wake up again! The postmortem report indicates that he died from pneumonia related complications. It is a life full of uncertainties! I will not delve into the complexities of this earthly life but I will recount some of the fondest memories that we shared with Patrick.

In school (Ntare), we didn’t have many students that went by the name Patrick. In fact, I was certain that I shared my Christian name with only him. But now the challenge came with having to call us out since we all went by the short name Pato. At first we fleeted with the idea of referring to him as Pato the basket-baller and me as Pato the debater but this would defeat the whole purpose of shortening our names because those would be a mouthful in themselves. Because he was the author and finisher of most of the school’s slang, he was a man who was never short of words. He had the seamless ability to conjure a word from nowhere. He was the one who came up with a solution when he decided to add ‘De’ before his short name and made a print at the back of his shirts with “De’ Pato” on it. Problem solved or as you would say, crisis averted. From then on, you would be looking for him if you mentioned “De’ Pato” and omission of the first word would mean it was me you were coming after.

De’ Pato and I shared many things beyond a name; we shared a class, a room, a football team, did the same combination plus many other preferences that space and time can never allow me to exhaust. The most prominent thing he was known for was probably basketball. He was never born playing basketball; he only learnt this in High School and boy he became a super star. He made the game look so easy, we called him the king of 3-pointers. He was the talk of school. For any basketball game that the school competed in, there were three constants, his signature 3-pointer, a dunk and a world class run. He was a real talent. In room, he was always throwing around things to hit imaginary targets and soon it rubbed off against many of us. On the sidelines of his stellar basketball career, he also groomed a tennis career and with this he was also part of the school’s elite brigade. If Ntare School was a military outfit, we would easily say that in as far as sports were concerned Kansiime Patrick constituted its top brass.

For many reasons, after joining different Universities, we wouldn’t talk as often but whenever we caught up, it was always a continuation of where we left it the last time. My last conversation with De’ Pato was about three weeks ago when he called in to wish me success in my forthcoming examinations. We wandered alot in our talks and I do remember how he kept teasing me about one of his beautiful cousins. We laughed about how I have always used academics as an excuse for not pursuing my woman crush. He always liked to tell me that the moment you like someone, reach out to them and make your feelings known. “Knock on the door and let them know that you are around. They can choose to open but even if they don’t, it will only be a matter of time before they do.” Oh I already miss those calls!

I can never forget the days during our holiday when he would connect the entire room on a conference call and then allow us to catch up. He had the luxury to do it because never in his life had he been short of resources but beyond that he had a heart that loved to give. He didn’t give because you asked but it was in his nature to make comfortable those around him. Phones were not allowed in school but somehow he had created exception to that rule. He carried his phone to school but it looked like it was never his. Most of the time, it was one of us either playing a game, texting away or even making those late night calls that many times yielded nil. For those who had girlfriends in other schools, it was that phone that helped keep the communication going, for some who were trying out their luck; he offered us hope through his phone. As people who spent our school days with him, these memories will forever remain part of us.

But like any other mortal, De’ Pato wasn’t without his flaws and struggles. He battled some illnesses and his education was at times interrupted but like a fearless warrior who never gave up, he soldiered on. He studied with dedication, completed his education and had started on the bitter-sweet arduous journey of employment. He had his other personal difficulties and many of those we may never know. Some he shared with his friends but others he only confided in his creator. It is heart breaking that the ugly pangs of death snatched him when he was only getting started with his life!

Patrick will be dearly missed by all of us that knew him, that laughed and enjoyed basking in his jokes and all that had an opportunity to cross his path. The most painful thing however will be that we won’t have the opportunity to send him off and say our final byes.

The angels in heaven will still welcome you Patrick!

Rest well De’ Pato!

We shall always miss you.